By Drew
There have been lots of discussions concerning these vaccines. Some of the folks that got them think they’re better than others because they are “being responsible”. To which, I have to admit…..their arguments sound a lot better than the anti vaxxers arguments…..they think….
The ones who, to be clear before they lose their minds, are not antix vax but are anti THIS vaccine, are very loud with their theories. They range from ,“I just need more info” to ….
Me? I’m at the “fuck it” part of the pandemic: I’m with Nal. One thing about Nal: His apathy is second only to his love for Kentucky Basketball….
The man wants to watch the world burn. So if we’re gonna let this bitch burn then here’s some gasoline for the fire as I give you 6 reasons to NOT get Vaccinated.
Less Traffic
I don’t know bout y’all but I live out east. Yeah we got a bly because of covid but the traffic out here is STILL more stupid than I would like. Why get vaccinated or encourage others to get vaccinated when, at this rate, we’ll be able to leave home at 8:30am to get to work for 9:00am?
And no, not EVERYONE dies from covid.
Let’s not be silly.
A LOT do but not everyone. In fact, anti vax folks will inform you (and probably me in the comments) that Covid has a high rate of mortality and blah blah more people die from potcake bites a year and blah blah. Listen, don’t bother tryna prove shit to me…..I’m right there with you. So with an island that’s majority obese, with rampant cases of High blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart failure, people being genuinely fat as shit and diabetes? What could possibly go wrong?
More Lockdowns
Not to brag but I was BUILT for them lockdowns last year. If there were any members of 10thYearSeniors who were happy for the lockdowns it was Nal and I.
Nal was so ecstatic over the lockdowns that he didn’t even know that we both were essential workers. This was Nal before he knew he was essential…
…and this was Nal when he realized he was able to roam Nassau streets freely….
…see the difference?
Exactly.
Bruh I was almost mad I had to work. I was SUPER grateful to be making money but understand I had been preparing my whole life for that one moment. We BOTH had.
Dakarai and Timothy was losing their minds much like other influencers who went from….
…to….
Bruh, influencers were struggling to stay relevant, roads were quiet, and we were able to roam around unchecked. PLEASE let’s get these covid cases up so we can lockdown again so Nal and I can know peace once more.
Population Control
Hear me out: Nassau full.
Ween have much space left. Out east mashup, Carmichael mashup, Palmdale clustered and I legit don’t even know if we’re allowed beyond Fresh Market West anymore.
So why are we encouraging people to get the vaccine so they can statistically survive Covid when we can just not encourage them to take it and create jobs and opportunities for the post covid disenfranchised?
What type Jehovah Witness ass logic is that?
I see people begging others to get the vaccine when, if we just let this happen the way its been happening, I could be Minister Of Health by this time next year.
What?
Lol…y’all think being Minister of Health is hard or something?
The Series Finale Of Princess Margaret Hospital
Princess Margaret Hospital is a disaster. Its run by a conch snack in a suit that thinks it’s a human man, a whole vagina doctor up and said, “Fuck it….lemme go be prime minister cause this ghetto”……it’s only saving grace is homemade bread.
Let that sink in.
While this literally happened last night….
….the only solace I have left is hospital bread. It is literally the best thing about the place we call a hospital where Bahamians go to hopefully not die. Not for healing….just to hopefully NOT die.
If another real wave hits and the vaccinated numbers are low then PMH will not be able to handle the load of sick people. Keep in mind the (Doctor) Prime Minister and coconut tree with a lineup, Renward Wells, in the middle of a pandemic, thought it wise to allegedly only have 8 contact tracing nurses.
Fucking 8.
We’re a country of almost 400,000 and they were like…
Nurses are leaving to go places that pay them a living wage. Junior doctors are still getting screwed with no lube and the conditions are still pretty shitty. PMH AC’s have been down in certain areas for months. How you can’t fix air conditions IN A GODDAMN HOSPITAL?! They clearly don’t give a shit about PMH so why do we? Let’s let it get over run with disease/death and start over I say!
Elitist Intellectuals Lose Their Arguments!
As I said earlier, you can catch covid and live. In fact, 1 in 3 Bahamians are convinced they had covid and are now immune to it because Whatsapp and Youtube.
No better way to barely survive covid than to brag about it online after receiving help from the medical professionals and scientists that you bashed earlier online. Not only is that a very very very very very smart thing to do, but then you can spread it to others so they too can prove their invincibility.
Nothing says, “I’m smarter than you”, like almost dying from covid then bragging about almost dying and denying the vaccine due to your almost death. That’s just big brain energy right there.
You show em, champ! You show em all!
Because There Is Zero Information Online
I hear a lot that a lot of you are “doing your research concerning the vaccine”. Y’all been saying that since it became a thing. Y’all have labs aye?
Honestly, I don’t blame you. Sure they may SAY there are reputable sites with factual info, scientists, scholars and people “smarter” than you with info at the ready. As well as what they call “common sense arguments” like…
I swear you send these morons off to college, they spend money, time and effort and come back with their precious good grades and they think they know more than us who use youtube for 5 step pasta recipes. In a youtube university world we are ALL equal, beloved.
RELAX.
There is very little to no info online about how all this happened so quickly. So, in order to justify my fears, I’ll gladly tell you to do your own research when I’m losing an argument and you ask me to name my reputable not whatsapp related sources.
Combat that debate style, smarty pants!
I pray to Dahl Regis that by now most if not all of you realize I am kidding. The fact that I have to say that this is a work of satire should let you know the amount of faith I have in most of you. Shit, I’m scared theres someone reading this and agreeing….
I’m vaccinated and so is Nal. In fact I only got vaccinated because Nal and Johnathon Marcus got vaccinated. Nal is deathly afraid of the zombie apocalypse and got the shot and John….well….John white. I feel like from you see white people getting it it should be safe.
If I’m being honest I don’t blame the anti vaxxers because this goddamn government did nothing to educate people on vaccines beyond…
So I get it…..also I don’t get it at all cause the internet is free and so much more than Facebook and Xnxx.com, bey…. I promise. And to you vaccinated folks please fuck off and let people make up their minds. You’re not better than them cause you got stuck with a prick and now you think you’re elite.
To the anti Vaxxers I have no issue with you beyond please, just don’t spread your 5G, mark of the beast, Bill Gates is trying to track us all bullshit. Just say you’re scared or not ready and know that’s ok, bey. Your phone BEEN trackin you, Jesus been comin from 1999 and ain reach yet, and Bill Gates doesn’t care about you in the slightest….RELAX.
Thinking it over is ok. These are scary times and being hesitant is ok. Just don’t operate within a confirmation bias mentality when doing your research. Have an open mind.
Regardless, wash your hands, wear a mask and be safe vaccinated or not. And whatever you do never forget that Nal just wants to watch the world burn….don’t let him win.
Be safe tho
