Why The Next Bahamian Prime Minister Should Be A Woman (For Diana)

The Next Bahamian Prime Minister Must Be A Woman (For Diana)

By Drew

In the war of words and thoughts between the 2 biggest comic houses, try and understand that I’m a DC nigga till the death of me. Marvel can kick rocks as far as I’m concerned. There is a quote from Gail Simone, a lead writer for Wonder Woman, that says:

“If you need to stop an asteroid, you call Superman. If you need to solve a mystery, you call Batman. But if you need to end a war, you call Wonder Woman.”

Try and understand that Wonder Woman has never given a shit.

Real life Translation: “Batman been slapping up with Joker for years….I BEEN woulda kill this nigga, on God”- Wonder Woman

If you don’t know by now from me constantly saying it in these too long articles, I was raised by women. Please try and understand that that fact can NOT be overstated. At this point the ratio from women to men in my family is probably 8-1. In other words I’ve been going to John Chea No.2 all my life to buy menstruation merch.

“Hi, can I get 1 Always with wings, 2 Tampax pearls and….what flavour of bubblicious would you recommend this evening, madam?

If you didn’t have the luxury of being raised by a multitude of strong women then let me try and explain why, at this point, we MUST make a woman our next Prime Minister.

Now, before we get into semantics, let’s get the assholes out of the way real quick. If you read the title of this article as a man and said to yourself, “Yeah but what bout when their period comes on? They ga wan go to war because gals lmaoooo”, then please leave. This article is not for you but do know that…..

Between me and Shelly Obama we got you, beloved. #OnGod

Why are niggas like this?

And let me be clear, we would be LUCKY if we get a woman as leader who only trips out one week out of the month.

This nigga tweets like he’s been on his period from 2016 but y’all scared of one week out the month? Lol…y’all wild

Don’t come at me with the bullshit about them being angry, temperamental or emotional. Y’all niggas will watch Tom Brady cry like a bitch after a late hit but Serena Williams gets frustrated and curses out an umpire and she’s, “Throwing a tantrum”. How is that a “tantrum” but Tom Brady is “passionate”?

…this ain a tantrum? He’s literally sitting on the field sobbing. #SorryFalseGodButItsTrue

So now that we’ve cleared the assholes out of the way, my question is simple……y’all ain tired of these niggas?

Y’all really want another 4 years of some man that has never given a shit about us, that’s BEEN rich with a touch of indifference for the proletariat and, frankly, has the moral compass of a conch snack…..with mayo?

If you put mayo on your conch snack you’re a shepherd for the devil and I will never trust you #UnwashedHeathens

Have y’all seen the queens that are kicking covids ass right now?

I know we’re having serious talky time but Finland looks thick on the low. #WashYaHandsTho

Now, one could argue that they are in foreign lands and not Carribean women to which I say….

Meet the Prime Minister of Barbados, Mia Mottley (You can tell by that gap in her teeth she is NOT to be fucked with. We must stan)

Those women prompted articles like this,

I didn’t access more of the Times by creating a free account at all and I am ok with that

…..AND right across the waters….

Meanwhile, in America….

This is Florida…y’all still tryna go to Walmart to bulk up on toiletries or y’all want y’all grammy live lil longer? I report, you decide

We tryna pretend like the Covid, Bahamian, pandemic lady ain been killing it this whole time?

Your favorite reporter’s worst nightmare.

We gonna act like I haven’t been fawning over Loretta Butler Turner now for YEARS and y’all still gone elect a nigga?

Sidenote: Loretta and I fake broke up our non existent relationship……. but I’ve healed. I have a new crush now.

Y’all know how I feel about women with that good Anita Baker cut #NewCrushWhoThis? #Pie

Hear me out.

I’m not one of these, “Women are better than men”, guys. I don’t think a female leader is any better or any worse than a man. I don’t think we should vote for gender primarily because that person has a functioning vagina.

This isn’t Themyscira.

The birthplace of the amazons/Wonder Woman and my love for tall women capable of murder. #LetMeHaveMyKinksInPeace

However, every single leader we’ve had has BEEN a man. In fact, let it sink in that we’ve literally only had 4 leaders. For 47 years we have had 4 men lead.

…ok…4 ½. But he leads “the womens dem” so please stay focused.

And the thing is, WE HAVE THE WOMEN. It’s not like ALL our female leaders are like homie from MICAL who can’t say numbers or words.

WE

HAVE

Not you

THE LEADERS!

And the list goes on because there are young women in government and in private institutions that are MORE than capable of leading or being in positions of leadership. Time to run a lot of these old guys out and start fresh and my question is…..why not a woman?

I’m not even trying to pretend like my notion of this is anywhere beyond the realm of, “Why the hell not?”.

I gave a plethora of examples from around the world of how amazing women have lead. I’ve given a Carribean example. Why do we have to always be the last one to attend the party when everyone else already had their fun? We’re gonna be the  last to legalize marijuana, last to realize NO ONE needs a Christian council, last to approve gay marriage, last to realize iceberg lettuce and tomatoes is NOT a goddamn salad…..

Pictured above: Water and Red water with seeds #itsNotASalad #Stop

Know who’s really good at planning and looking ahead? WOMEN.

A woman will meet you and know within 5 minutes if she’s gonna have sex with you or not. She already planned the kids, their school, what area you gonna live in….

“Hi my name is your new wife nigga. You better like SAC because that’s where our children goin. I wonder if he know we’ll be buying a house in Blair? Anyway let me start this wedding Budget Gina!

We watched ALL our leaders cave to countries, foreigners, tourists….know who wasn’t gonna do that shit?

Women.

Can you imagine if those tourists jumped the fence to go to the beach on a Bahamian woman’s watch?

If you don’t understand the energy in this gif then understand you’re in danger every day on this island. #StayWoke

Women take care of home first…it’s what they were taught to do from day one.

Watch this.

Ladies, what would you do right now with $700?

“I ga put something on the light bill. Ethan need new school shoes and we need couple items from the store”

Men?

…to be fair….I too would like a PS5 but I also have the maturity of a morbidly obese infant on cocaine so there’s that

Again, not ALL men and not ALL women.

I’m sure some woman saw $700 and thought…

“Girl I find $700…..you still have that good Remy in stock? YAAAAASSSSSS bitch. Hold that fa me I comin”

…and some nigga with actual responsibilities read that like…

“$700 is exactly the amount I needed to start my business because I’m more mature than Andrew for sure!”

But can we just agree that women are more forward thinking than men?

Can we agree that they would be just as awesome as leaders as men? I say we just give it a shot. We have smart, intelligent, powerful women in this country and they should be given a chance so that my future daughters can have someone to look up to.

…guess ween using no more condoms in my dreams, babes. Can’t wait for this hypothetical daughter to never happen #LoveYouBabes #SomeoneTagJahzinoPlease

Now, ladies….a quick word. Gents just…just stop reading for a sec lemme talk to these women.

Sigh….good day, queens.

Now I just wrote 1,438 words backin y’all up and tryna state y’all case for niggas, AND women…….cause lets not forget when a gaggle of WOMEN helped that legislation to go through so y’all kids with foreigners wouldn’t be considered Bahamian.

Ine forget.

When Shaunie Miller have this skeety lil biracial, super, Derek Jeter baby don’t claim him. Keep that SAME backwards energy y’all pastors tell y’all have for your OWN goddamn rights

Know why y’all haven’t taken over the world yet? Because y’all can’t get along with each other.

Yes, yes I know, Kasmine and other feminists that read that and seethed. I know a history of patriarchy and systematic misogyny by men that looked like me held you down and kept you captive for years. My grandmother is 103 and marched for the women’s suffrage movement. My other grandmother marched with Lynden Pindling when we were made independent. I know that men stood on your backs to climb higher heights and you were ignored, beaten, cheated on and forgotten by men you gave birth to, raised, loved, married and nurtured.

Queen….I know.

I can wax poetic all day about how far y’all have come, what you’ve achieved and what you can achieve.

There’s not a Bahamian woman alive or dead that I can’t thank.

But both things can be true.

If I can acknowledge that, can we acknowledge a lot of women have black crab syndrome and one so toxic that they only wanna see themselves win among the “men in the room”? Can we have that conversation?

Looka the feminists livid at the idea of nuance and balance…lol..Love y’all tho

You will NEVER win this struggle without helping each other. And I wanna see y’all win….my GOD I wanna see y’all win. But it’s gonna take all of you united as one. It’s gonna take all of you being on the same page. Christians, sinners, muslim, white, black, Asian, women that drink guiness straight from the bottle….

Yeah, thas them

If you wanna see a woman in power…… unite. There is strength in numbers especially when women are involved.

Men…same to you.

Stop talkin shit under these women’s posts just in hopes of getting vagina.

I see y’all.

“Honestly Andrews words are so true. Women are flawless and perfect and in this too long facebook post I will show why I haven’t had sex since Prince died.” #RIPPrinceTho

Bruh….chill.

You can be an ally without being a panty I promise. It’s perfectly fine to support women and not beg for sex shortly after. But they need us to help too.

And no….I don’t have the answers and I don’t understand government. Typically for matters like this I consult the false god Ricardo Wells because he knows this stuff.  But I do know its time for a change. And if your response to this is contrary to what I said (And that’s perfectly ok to be honest) then my question is simple: Why not them and why not now?

We’ve had our Superman that moved an asteroid that was blocking our path to independence…

Superman

We’ve had our Batman AND our Robin who got their hands dirty after the dust settled…..

Y’all argue amongst yourself which is which. Its above me now

But we are at war.

At war with rising poverty and a soon non existent middle class. We’re at war with rampant, almost instinctive blatant misogyny. We’re at war with our education system, crime, xenophobia, homophobia, pedophilia, diversification of resources, and I could go on.

Just remember what Gail Simone, Wonder Woman’s writer, had to say about who to call when you want to end a war…

If we’re choosing fighters……I’m with her

Be safe tho

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