8YJ – I Need a Minute – Fyre Festival

By 8YJ

In the latest podcast, we recap last Ja Rule and Billy McFarland’s Fyre Festival. The worst planned event in Bahamian history. And that’s saying something. Like you almost have to work at it to be this bad at something.

Most Bahamians didn’t even know this event was going on yet somehow it consumed our entire news cycle and we had to endure phrases like “natives”, feral dogs, aggressive locals and no infrastructure. Shit just reading that The Bahamas sounds awful, a cross between the LOST island from season one and Fury Road. So to begin well

So to begin well festival goers were promised a one of a kind luxury experience with private planes, yachts, models and a private island (code for do all the drugs you want guys).

Look to hang out with them it’ll only be around $2,000 – $12,000 that’s practically a deal.

This photo represented everything Fyre festival used in their marketing campaign, models, people who are Instagram famous aka “influencers”, Kendall Jenner, and of course cool drone videos. Who doesn’t like cool drone videos? Just look at it…

So that’s what the children of privilege were promised but instead of gold plated cabanas with built in fellatio stations, and molly vending machines they got this…

Oh, the humanity.

No, the tents weren’t that bad, but there was a lot of hyperbole surrounding their description with the words, disaster relief tents in every article you would think they were given a sheet and a pole and told to figure that shit out. But then the picture that made this thing go really viral.

Hhahahahaha Ok now they have a point.

Aight this is indefensible. This sandwich was referenced in the book of revelations I’m sure. Like who doesn’t toast this kind of bread fam? But the outrage

Please do yourself a favor and check out twitter for these #FyreFestival tweets.

Yes! Yes! Yes! Man do these people hate irony. Anyway, so as this shit show was kicking into high gear the vlogs from Exuma started to drop and they were just all gold.

The bottom line I kept going back to as I watched these vlogs and read their stories was these people are going to be fine. This is at most an inconvenience to them and any lasting impact would be on the reputation of The Bahamas.

And every response was #CYC

Friend of the pod Sherice Major was on the ground for this clusterfuck and we promised we wouldn’t upload any of the voicenotes but she did write this recap and vlogged this report for all of us. Giving us a Bahamian perspective on the day’s events.

Late in the day, Ja sent a tweet that was incoherent and didn’t make any sense, the ringer even wrote a full piece on that tweet alone. It was our boy the legend Billy McFarland who saved the day though…oh and he threw the Bahamas under the bus with our lack of infrastructure and not being exactly like America.

 

Thank you for listening and if shit sounds too good to be true remember to give it a second, third and fourth looks, Abd last but not least everyone say it with me, “Where is Ja?!?!?!

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